A Vacation Remembered

This week I stumbled upon our vacation photos from May and fondly remembered the joy and peace found on this trip to the coast.  The clouds rushed in and out threatening of storms that never came while creating stunning portraits in the sky.  I was enthralled with the clouds, so many different shapes and designs...when I wasn't looking up...I was following the trail of shells for miles down the beach lured by the shine and shimmer and the amazing colors gifted from the sea.  There was also a visit to a lighthouse which I learned had been kept two different women when it was active.  This knowledge set off all kinds of adventuresome daydreams of beach combing and intimately knowing a piece of land and her changes in weather and season.

Twilight Time

Twilight, Muddy Creek Greenway, view from bench

She said, "Twilight is my favorite time.  The sounds and colors shift and signal the settling of the day."

Tuesday evening my Mother and I sat on a bench together at the Greenway and enjoyed the last bits of color dance across the sky as evening became night.  We held hands and reminisced and dreamed out loud.  We cried a little and laughed a little.  We listened and recognized each other like only we can.   We spoke aloud how much that moment, together on the bench, hand in hand, gazing at the sky amongst the wild things, meant to us.

Time feels so fleeting right now.  It is a mixture of the approaching fall and winter, the nearness of my birthday in the coming month, and the reality that we will close on a new home tomorrow.  All of these events signal that another cycle is coming to an end as another one begins.  There is much to be joyful for.  There is much to be thankful for.  There are tears and longing swirled amongst the joy and I will hold this memory of this twilight close to my heart forever. 

Impromptu Trip

Central Park

July has been filled with gifts large and small and one of those gifts was an invitation to New York for a few days to visit a friend and attend a performance of Zarkana at Radio City Music Hall.  It had been years since I had been to New York (we are talking late 1990's) so I really did not know what to expect.  Other than a slight delay from the origin airport, there were no issues what so ever getting to La Guardia and getting a taxi to Upper West Side.  Of course I had copious notes from my friend on how to get there and which cross streets to mention along with a picture of the building. 

During my 3 day visit we:

* Walked through Central Park (#50 on my Wish List).
* Had cocktails at the Oceana Restaurant (They have the most beautiful blue agate stone mosaic columns that I could not capture by photograph).
* Attended an AMAZING performance of Zarkana at Radio City Music Hall.
* Discovered my love of Corona Beans and Shrimp at Cafe Fiorello.
* Shared a pot of coffee and talked for hours in our PJ's.
* Bought a gently used (and signed) book of Poetry at a neat thrift store called Housing Works.
* Darted in and out of lovely boutiques to beat the heat and to shop with my eyes.
* Ate lunch at Frida's (yummy).
* Went to the Museum of Natural History and studied the stuffed animals.
* Had cocktails and giggles at the Ocean Grill.  I loved the dark wood and molted mirrored walls with white coral sconces.
* Ordered take-out pizza and talked and giggled some more.
* Shopped West Elm and Pottery Barn for inspiration and discovered Gracious Home.

This invitation was one of those moments when my head said NO (No you just got back from the beach, no you don't have a job, no you can't have fun when Alan is stuck at home working, no you still have another long distance invitation to fulfill, no you need to look for homes...) and my heart said YES (yes you need this, yes this is a gift you have been given take it, yes today is all you have)...so glad that I listened to my heart. 

New York Trip in Pictures

Feeling Brave

Perhaps it is procrastination but I would rather think of it as bravery...bravery has brought me to the place where I am moved to start this blog...tonight...when I should be cleaning out closets, packing, painting, cleaning, even nurturing a dream I have of clay and words.  I have dreamed of this blog for several months now and asked myself exactly what I hoped to accomplish with it.  My intent is that this blog will be a vision board, a journal, a place to share, and that somehow my bravery will grow.  That in sharing I will help myself and maybe somehow help encourage someone else. 

My bravery started back in the later summer of 2010 after a weekend at the beach when a dear friend suggested I needed a time out....a break...a sabbatical....a restart.  So I started looking for a retreat-a grown up version of camp basically (but without the polar bear club thankfully).  I looked on-line for over a month and explored retreats offered from meditative retreats at the Deepok Chopra Center to yoga retreats in the mountains of Asheville, NC.  Each retreat I found, and there were about 15, spoke to me in some small way but they did not make my heart sing.  One day as I was reading a favorite blog I stumbled upon Be Present Retreats and after reading and re-reading about it I book marked the site.  Then I began to let this idea simmer.  A day or two later I e-mailed Liz, the organizer and brain child of the retreat and asked her several questions.  I remember telling her that I was not an artist, I was not a photographer, I was not a writer, I was not a yogi, and that I was not practicing meditation but that I felt so drawn to her retreat.  She said come.  In hindsight I can now say I am all of those and so much more.  Don't get me wrong, I am not a master at any of those roles, but I can honestly say that I practice each role and enjoy the practice. I was still so afraid.  Afraid of everything that I was not and everything that the other women would be.  I was lucky to be among 12 bright, talented, loving, creative, sharing, caring and light bearing women for 4 amazing days.  That space I was given along with the love and encouragement from my husband, my mother, and my two best friends has brought me to this place...of bravery.

I look forward to where this will lead and of the journey ahead. 

New Beginings