Saturday, December 31, 2011

New Years Eve

What do I love about New Years Eve?  The raw potential, reading other people's facebook and blog posts and seeing the hope they have, the readiness to let go of what is no longer working for them, the shimmering light at the end of the tunnel,...the freshness of it all. 

On this New Years Eve, I am wishing you healing where it is needed, trust to recognize your dreams, strength to see those dreams come to life, joy in your heart, and a connection with the pulse of life around you that lets you see just how very much a LOVED and NECESSARY part of the universe you are.

I will admit I am going into the New Year with tears and smiles, light and dark, fear and hope...and also the growing (expanding and increasing) knowledge of how very precious this very moment is.

 
The new year is a whisper
in my ear.
So close I turn around smiling
thinking I hear her enter the room.
a breath of fresh air.
a new day.
sunshine and rain and foggy mist rising.
courage to put one foot
in front of the other,
forward going.
the taste of incoming tide
salty and blue,
cleansing.
the currents carrying sea
foam far unto the horizon.
This is as much a blessing for me
as it is for you.
A story more ancient than
light.
Shake out the dust.
Blow the motes a gentle kiss.
You are soft
warm clay.

Wednesday, December 28, 2011

Unfolding


All weekend I felt like fall.
I counted the moons and tides
and the lines of my own mapped body.


Today I feel like lapis
washed  soft and smooth
with veins of pyrite sparkling.


I am timeless and nameless,
in tune for this very moment
with the energy of all life.


This very well may be my fall.
In spring I was drunk on the green vine,
shatter proofed.
In the summer I was lustful and lazy
in the damp humidity of creation.


A praying mantis dead and broken on my door step,
the color of green-grey bark,
is placed on my mantle
along with the birds’ nest,
long empty,
and the remnants of lilies and a gum tree barb.


I see differently now.
There are stories unfolding.
Leaves fall like pages turning.

Monday, December 19, 2011

Today is


Today is bright sunshine and cold blue skies with grilled pimento cheese sandwiches.  There are plans to see old friends and dinner with family later in the week.  There are lines of poetry rattling around in my head that are like those elusive dreams we wake from and I cannot seem to capture their luster as I reach for my pen and paper.  So I smile and let them rattle on, knowing sooner or later they will come out in some form or fashion; a conversation shared here, a letter posted there, or in a tear gliding down my cheek while contemplating the light and dark of the world. 

Friday, December 2, 2011

The Ocean Calling

Tidal Tree

The day was renaissance blue skies and cooler temperatures, bright sunshine and gusts of winds scattered here and there.  During my walk through the cemetery earlier this week the leaves on this tree gave a familiar sound.  There was a rushing in and a letting out that I initially found pleasant but ignored until my brain ran through its memory garden in search of a definition and then found it. It was the rushing in and the letting out of the tide that I heard.

After listening for several minutes I walked on and realized that this city scape that surrounds me has become my sea shore of sorts. On my daily walks my eyes dart back and forth from the sky line to the ground.  The ground holds glittering scraps of treasure that I want to pluck up and place inside my pockets, remnants of what was, wrapped with the promise of what could be.

Fortune 1

Fortune 2
Street Glass
As I write this I also acknowledge that I have not picked up one single thing though because in the city I think of these items as trash (coveted trash) while at the sea shore I think of them as found treasure.  Today I will find a pretty jar and start adding little pieces of my city treasure to it.

I treasure rocks, glass, fortunes, and sea shells (to name a few).  What items do you call treasure and collect?



 

Sunday, November 20, 2011

A Quiet Spot


Golden Leaves
I am still adjusting to the sounds of the city after moving from our quiet home nestled at the end of the street and flocked with trees on 2 sides of our property. It has the kind of quiet where you can hear your own breath catch when you look up at the night sky full of bright shining stars. Not as quiet as where my parents live in the country, but close.
Maple leaves lining the paths

The first few weeks of being in the city I found myself a little jumpy after my walks down the side walked streets full of cars zooming past, from the sirens of police cars and fire trucks and ambulances within close proximity and the population of winos that I occassionally ran into by the corner grocery. I wanted to experience the city but I also longed for a quiet spot amongst the spontaneous combustion of it all.   A place where I could go to experience nature in sight, sound, and smell.
Lovely Statues

The spot I found happens to be an old cemetery right across from our building and it is just lovely. Established in 1851, it is full of winding tree-lined lanes, ancient trees with presence and wisdom, statues, birdsong , and squirrels running around chasing each other. 


Hawk



























 I was thrilled at seeing this magnificent hawk in the cemetery as well.  None of the pictures taken from my phone do him (or her) justice.  I watched him fly over to this leafless tree and followed him over there, all the time holding my breath and hoping he would not fly away.  He is definitely a city hawk because he let me get as close as I wanted, right under the limb he was on in fact and snap away with my camera phone. 



This is a blurry photo of him starring at me in wonder or perhaps annoyance.


Wednesday, November 16, 2011

Green in the Grey

Clover
Today the sky is the color of slate and there is a slow and steady drizzle falling.  The leaves that have been hanging on tightly to the trees are now coming down in droves but it was this patch of green clover that caught my eye this morning.  It reminds me of my brief trip to Washington State  and how the grey skies there made the greenery even more intense.

Tuesday, November 15, 2011

A Public Service Announcement of Sorts

Graffiti Painting- Fifth Street Underpass


This image stopped me in my tracks the other day as I walking along the sidewalk.  It gave me pause and inspiration. 


“Find the love you seek, by first finding the love within yourself. Learn to rest in that place within you that is your true home.”
- Sri Sri Ravi Shankar

Tuesday, October 18, 2011

New Beginnings


The days have been filled with the golden light of fall, new sights from our little slice of the city we are moving to, trays and pails of fresh paint, decision fatigue, installing shelves and lighting and hooks and ceiling fans, exhausted evenings on an inflatable mattress that cause the last bits of the days energy to burst out in giggles, and a birthday to top it all off.

The photo is of my birthday card from Alan.  How appropriate for my birthday and as we are on the cusp of Halloween.  He said that he couldn't quite explain why but it made him think of me.  I smiled because I agree, I see it too though I can't quite put all of the pieces together.  Maybe it is the homemade and sweet mishmash nature of the costume, or the so-happy-you-could-burst grin.  I love capes and masks too so maybe that is what it is.  Perhaps it is just playing make believe and dress up and trying on the persona of who we want to be, in a moment, or for a day or even forever.  It is not quite a cape but I did receive a very much desired sweater poncho as a birthday gift and I plan to wear it as my magic cloak this fall and winter. 

Our move, my birthday, and the shift of seasons all bring with them change.  Our move will bring with it new discoveries in a new city and adjustments as well especially as we get used to not having a yard to call our own.  Birthdays are to me New Years; there is a pause and a chance to reflect as well as a chance to begin again.  And no matter how old I get, Fall still reminds me of going back to school.  I want fresh notebooks to fill and a new pair of shoes to wear and new thoughts to stretch my mind.

I hope you are finding magic in your fall days and just the right amount of change you need to keep things fresh but not chaotic.

Friday, September 30, 2011

A Recipe

Poblano and Serrano Peppers and the last of the Mexican Miniature Tomatoes


This week while I was mowing the yard these Poblano Peppers from our little garden caught my eye.  I kept waiting for them to get bigger but I think this may be their correct size.  I fretted that I may have waited to long  to pick them but thankfully they were just right. Come August I really lose my enthusiasm for the garden and everything that makes it is valiant and resilient in the truest since.  I have suckers on my pitiful tomato vines and overgrown okra the size of cucumbers.  Thankfully the chives and thyme take care of themselves.

This is my first time growing Poblano Peppers so I was eager to find a recipe to use them in. The thought of stuffing them full of cheese was very appealing (I love cheese) but I wanted something a little different than stuffed peppers.  I found a wonderful recipe and it was so easy to make too-Green Rice!  When you first taste the rice there is almost a smokiness from the peppers that suggests heat is to come but it never does.  In fact there is no burning sensation at all just yumminess and a desire to have another forkful and then another.  Feel free to add a little cheese on top too!  :)  This rice is the most lovely shade of green and makes a wonderful side dish or main course.  We had fish tacos and black beans with ours.


1 2/3 cups chicken broth or water
2 fresh poblano chiles, stems and seeds removed, and roughly chopped
12 sprigs cilantro, plus extra for garnish
Salt, about 1/2 teaspoon if using salted broth, 1 teaspoon if using unsalted or water
1 tablespoon vegetable or olive oil
1 cup rice, preferably medium grain
1 small white onion, cut into 1/4-inch dice
5 garlic cloves, peeled and finely chopped

The flavoring: In a 2-quart saucepan, combine the broth and chiles, bring to a boil, then partially cover and simmer gently over medium to medium-low heat for about 10 minutes, until the chiles are very soft. Pour the chile mixture into a food processor, add the cilantro (stems and all), and process to a smooth puree. Press through a medium-mesh strainer into a bowl and stir in the salt.

The rice: Wipe the pan clean, add the oil and heat over medium. Add the rice and onion, and cook, stirring regularly, until the rice is chalky looking and the onion is soft, about 5 minutes. Stir in the garlic and cook a minute longer.

Add the warm (or reheated) chile liquid to the hot rice pan, stir once, scrape down any rice kernels clinging to the side of the pan, cover, and cook over medium-low heat for 15 minutes. Uncover and check a grain of rice: It should be nearly cooked through. If the rice is just about ready, turn off the heat, re-cover and let stand for 5 to 10 minutes longer to complete the cooking. If the rice seems far from done, continue cooking for 5 minutes or so, retest, then turn off the heat and let stand a few minutes longer. Fluff with a fork, scoop into a warm serving dish, decorate with cilantro sprigs and it's ready to serve.

Advance preparation: The rice can be made several days ahead; turn out the fluffed rice onto a baking sheet to cool, transfer to a storage container, then cover and refrigerate. Reheat the rice in a steamer basket set over boiling water.

Variations and improvisations: An obvious variation is to use 3 or 4 long green (Anaheim) chiles, or to mix poblanos and long greens with hotter chiles like jalapeño, manzano or habanero.

Thursday, September 29, 2011

Twilight Time

Twilight, Muddy Creek Greenway, view from bench


She said, "Twilight is my favorite time.  The sounds and colors shift and signal the settling of the day."

Tuesday evening my Mother and I sat on a bench together at the Greenway and enjoyed the last bits of color dance across the sky as evening became night.  We held hands and reminisced and dreamed out loud.  We cried a little and laughed a little.  We listened and recognized each other like only we can.   We spoke aloud how much that moment, together on the bench, hand in hand, gazing at the sky amongst the wild things, meant to us.

Time feels so fleeting right now.  It is a mixture of the approaching fall and winter, the nearness of my birthday in the coming month, and the reality that we will close on a new home tomorrow.  All of these events signal that another cycle is coming to an end as another one begins.  There is much to be joyful for.  There is much to be thankful for.  There are tears and longing swirled amongst the joy and I will hold this memory of this twilight close to my heart forever. 

Sunday, September 18, 2011

A Poem

Photo taken September 2010, Washington State

This poem struck me with its simple beauty of witnessing everyday life; the stories that take place in our lives in between the stories we tell.  I find it serendipitous that often, when I don't know how to tell my own story, I often find a poem to tell it for me. 

Telephone Repairman

By Joseph Millar

All morning in the February light
he has been mending cable,
splicing the pairs of wires together
according to their colors,
white-blue to white-blue
violet-slate to violet-slate,
in the warehouse attic by the river.

When he is finished
the messages will flow along the line:
thank you for the gift,
please come to the baptism,
the bill is now past due:
voices that flicker and gleam back and forth
across the tracer-colored wires.

We live so much of our lives
without telling anyone,
going out before dawn,
working all day by ourselves,
shaking our heads in silence
at the news on the radio.
He thinks of the many signals
flying in the air around him
the syllables fluttering,
saying please love me,
from continent to continent
over the curve of the earth.

Saturday, September 3, 2011

A Short Movie


This is a short shaky movie of a recent bike ride at the greenway near my house.  It had been years since I had ridden and I forgot the joy of having the wind rush at you as you fly down the path.  The path that I bike is thankfully flat and is flanked by a tree-lined creek on one side and meadows of wildflowers and brushy weeds on the other. 

This week during my bike ride I had several days where I felt absolutely wonderful (perfect really) and life felt as if I were in a movie.  The birds, crickets, and tree frogs were in synchronized symphony, the breeze was cool and gentle and tinged with the scent of cedar, the sky the most perfect shade of blue and dotted with zippity little clouds of fuzzy white, and my heart was somehow beating in rhythm with everything as I peddled my legs down the path before me.  There was a smile plastered wide across my face and  I smiled even deeper as I felt gratitude in my heart for this moment and savored it knowing how precious it is to feel this harmony.  This ride for me is like a moving meditation.  The sounds and smells center me and there is no past and no future, only now. 

I hope you are finding moments of harmony and joy in your September.

Tuesday, August 16, 2011


Begin Again
 
The smell of cedar
awakens the memory of Self-Reliance.
The similarities between poplar leaves
and manta rays could keep me
occupied until eternity.


I don’t know when I will stop crying
or what the ancient pyramids of Egypt
look like at dusk.


After 9 months of freedom
I do know how to cook.
I know now that I can always
begin again.
 

Healing will be a lifelong journey.

Thursday, August 11, 2011

Sometimes...

Sometimes we are carried and
sometimes we carry.
Other times we float along hand in hand.

Sometimes a simple song from before
is sung in a new voice and
old words become new.

Sometimes old words reminds us
how wonderful life is.
How wonderful that you're in the world.

making everything new.

Saturday, August 6, 2011

On Finding a Snakeskin




Thursday evening I found a small snakeskin just the length of a pencil.  I had gone outside late in the evening just before dusk to water the plants and change the birdbath water.  The snakeskin was left by the spigot as if it was meant to be found.  I left it alone and made a quick inventory of my surroundings to see if a snake was nearby although I suspected the snake had left days before.  I went about my watering all the time thinking about that skin and the symbolism contained therein.  What had I shed this past year, what was I still in the process of shedding, and what was I still clinging tightly to that needed to be shed?

Over the past 10 months I have given up (shed) smoking cigarettes, and shed about 90% of the desire for those cigarettes.  I left (shed) a career that I once loved that had become all to consuming and no longer enjoyable for me and shed the guilt and shame that I had for leaving it.  I have thrown away, given away, and thrifted (shed) years of possessions and clutter from clothing, books, baskets, boxes, cups, and mugs, to old magazines, college papers and travel guides that no longer fit or had meaning in my life. 

While I still have more to be shed, just like the snake it was necessary for me to shed in order to develop. And just like the snake, I felt vulnerable and needed quiet and inactivity during and after the shedding process.

The snake passes through rough areas that can trap and hold the skin so the snake can slide out and leave old the skin behind.  My old skin was caught on the pavement and between sharp blades of grass during my daily walks, between the nap of the paper and the tip of the pen as I wrote in my journal, pressed between lips and teeth and pink gums as I shared my truth with those around me, between the circular rings of fine lines on the pads of my fingertips and the black and white keys of the keyboard, and on the rigid surface as paint and brush glided across the canvas.  I did not lose the skin in one continuous and definite piece, but more like a sanding away, scale by scale.

And while I am currently 38 (fastly dawning upon 39) and not what one would call young, I feel brand new and shiny in ways I never have before.

Birds lose feathers in order to gain new ones.  Animals shed their pelt and furs as the seasons change. Cicadas leave behind amber shells of their former selves.  Blue crabs go through a phase known as teneral when they are fresh and pale and soft bodied just before their body hardens and it is during this phase that they grow. 

Maybe you too will be led to think of what you have lost (shed) and of what you have gained (grown) this past year.  I think nature is an ever-present gift providing us prompts for living if only we will listen and see and smell and hear her call.

Monday, August 1, 2011

Blueberry Picking

Saturday I had the delight of meeting up with an old friend for a quick breakfast and three hours of blueberry picking.  I love that these blueberry fields are off the beaten path and that the honor system can still be found here with an attention getting yellow lock box the only technology I needed to interact with. 

Honor Box
The blueberries were found in a meadow surrounded by woods and they grew on these tall tree-like bushes. 

Entering the meadow, the blueberries are off to the left
The bushes were heavy with berries of each life stage from tiny green buds to medium cranberry like berries and all the way up to button sized berries full of sweetness and smiles.
 


I actually picked more berries than I ate (2 gallons) but made up for that later when I got home and went about cleaning and drying them. The berries are the most beautiful shade of blue-purple-black depending on the light and remind me of what I imagine octopus ink would look like.

Just-washed blueberries

Saturday, July 30, 2011

Lima Bean Salad Recipe

I have been craving a fresh and new cold bean salad since I tasted the Corona Bean and Shrimp Salad at Cafe Fiorello in New York.  Since I had a friend coming over for lunch on Friday I decided to test a recipe that I found for Butter Bean Salad and changed the beans to these giant lima beans we have at our grocery store and also added a generous amount of freshly chopped Italian Flat Leaf Parsley.  Oh it is so good that I thought I would share here. 

I imagine this recipe could be changed to suit different taste's and how you could add shrimp if you like or even serve it warm in the winter, but for these 98 degree days, cold is perfect for me.  My friend loved it and asked for the recipe and my sister-in-law had two servings of it and raved about it.  I hope you like it too! 

PS...I served it with fresh corn on the cob that my friend brought and fresh out of the oven tomato pie that I wrote about before.

Butter Bean Salad Recipe courtesy Rachael Ray
  • 2 cans butter beans, rinsed and drained, 15 ounces each (or Butter Beans-that is what I used)
  • 1/2 red bell pepper, diced
  • 1/2 green bell pepper, diced
  • 1/2 red onion, chopped
  • 2 cloves garlic, peeled and minced
  • 1 teaspoon ground cumin, 1/3 palm full
  • 2 tablespoons extra virgin olive oil
  • 1 large lemon, juiced
  • Coarse salt and freshly ground black pepper
  • 1 Palm full of Italian Fat Leaf Parsley (my addition)

Directions

Combine all ingredients in a medium bowl. Toss to coat beans and vegetables evenly in dressing.

Now I am off to pick blueberries with another friend. Have a Delightful Day!

Monday, July 25, 2011

Impromptu Trip

Central Park
July has been filled with gifts large and small and one of those gifts was an invitation to New York for a few days to visit a friend and attend a performance of Zarkana at Radio City Music Hall.  It had been years since I had been to New York (we are talking late 1990's) so I really did not know what to expect.  Other than a slight delay from the origin airport, there were no issues what so ever getting to La Guardia and getting a taxi to Upper West Side.  Of course I had copious notes from my friend on how to get there and which cross streets to mention along with a picture of the building. 

During my 3 day visit we:

* Walked through Central Park (#50 on my Wish List).
* Had cocktails at the Oceana Restaurant (They have the most beautiful blue agate stone mosaic columns that I could not capture by photograph).
* Attended an AMAZING performance of Zarkana at Radio City Music Hall.
* Discovered my love of Corona Beans and Shrimp at Cafe Fiorello.
* Shared a pot of coffee and talked for hours in our PJ's.
* Bought a gently used (and signed) book of Poetry at a neat thrift store called Housing Works.
* Darted in and out of lovely boutiques to beat the heat and to shop with my eyes.
* Ate lunch at Frida's (yummy).
* Went to the Museum of Natural History and studied the stuffed animals.
* Had cocktails and giggles at the Ocean Grill.  I loved the dark wood and molted mirrored walls with white coral sconces.
* Ordered take-out pizza and talked and giggled some more.
* Shopped West Elm and Pottery Barn for inspiration and discovered Gracious Home.

This invitation was one of those moments when my head said NO (No you just got back from the beach, no you don't have a job, no you can't have fun when Alan is stuck at home working, no you still have another long distance invitation to fulfill, no you need to look for homes...) and my heart said YES (yes you need this, yes this is a gift you have been given take it, yes today is all you have)...so glad that I listened to my heart. 
New York Trip in Pictures

Monday, July 18, 2011

Fireflies at Dusk

The start of the painting in June
I started this painting in early June with the intention of practicing paint drips.  Originally it reminded me of eyes and with the drips I thought of blue eyes crying in the rain.  Last week I decided to move forward with two of my paintings and this one especially.  I thought that perhaps I would paint in blocks of color around the crying eyes.  The blocks became swaths of color here and there that felt like the tide.  There were quiet feelings of solitude swirling in the paint as well as Bon Iver playing on repeat in the background that contributed to the evolution of this painting.  When I stepped away from the painting hours later I saw firefly's at dusk. I also thought of Van Gogh's swirly works of art but did not set out to imitate his style at all when I was painting.

Fireflies at Dusk


Close up


Still not sure if the painting was complete or not, the next day I asked my visiting nephew for his critique.  This was risky business asking a child for their opinion because give it they will.  He said "it's done Aunt Effie", and I let out the air I didn't even realize I was holding and smiled. 

Sam with his own painting of a Rocket Ship

Tuesday, July 12, 2011

A Recipe

Ever since tasting a wonderful tomato pie several years ago at Mozelle's, a local restaurant, I have been wanting to try to make one of my own.  With tomatoes coming in now and another tomato lover inviting me to the beach, I thought our beach trip would be the perfect opportunity to try out a recipe I found.  I mean tomatoes and cheese in a pie...what could go wrong with that?  Nothing!  It was heavenly. 

There are not any pictures of the pie that we made as I still have not quite got the hang of taking pictures of food that looks good. I did however take a picture of the beautiful tomatoes that were used to create the pie, and the link to the recipe shows a picture that looks just like the one we made.  It is one rich pie and could be served as a hearty appetizer or as a meal with a small salad.   I hope you enjoy it!

PS....We used a frozen store bought crust instead of the homemade one listed and used extra cheddar and monterey jack cheeses in place of the fontina cheese.

Heirloom Tomato Pie With Black Pepper Parmesan Crust
serves 6

for the crust
1 ½ cups all-purpose flour
1 tsp salt
2 tbsp fresh grated parmesan
2 tsp coarsely ground black pepper
10 tbsp cold unsalted butter, cut into small chunks
1/3 cup ice water

for the filling
5 heirloom tomatoes, sliced, salted and well drained*
½ cup mayonnaise
½ cup sharp cheddar cheese, grated
½ cup monterey jack cheese, grated
¼ cup fontina, grated
10-12 basil leaves, chopped
1 bunch of chives, chopped
salt and pepper

*To avoid a case of pie soggy bottom, the tomatoes need to drain on a metal rack for about an hour.

Preheat the oven to 350 degrees. To make the crust, combine the flour, salt, parmesan and black pepper in a food processor. Pulse a few times to combine. Add the butter, and pulse until the mixture’s largest chunks are about pea sized. With the food processor running, slowly drizzle the ice water through the feed tube until the dough starts to form a single ball. Gather the dough together and place on the center of a piece of plastic wrap. Cover and shape into a small disc. Chill for at least 30 minutes in the fridge. Remove dough from the fridge, and allow to sit on the counter for about 15 minutes. Flour your rolling surface, and gently roll the dough out into a 12-inch circle. Drape the dough over the rolling pin and transfer to a 9-inch pie dish. Trim the edges and pinch into a decorative design. With a fork, poke holes in the bottom of the entire crust. Place a piece of parchment paper into the center of the pie dish with the edges gathered so as to not touch the edges of the crust. Place enough dried beans or pie weights onto the foil to just fill the bottom. Bake the pie crust for 15 minutes, remove paper and pie weights and allow to cool.

To assemble the pie, mix the mayonnaise, cheddar and Monterey Jack cheeses in a small bowl. Season with salt and pepper. Layer the tomato slices, basil and chives to the top of the cooled pie crust. Spread the cheese mixture on top of the tomatoes. Sprinkle the fontina on top, and bake for 30 minutes until the cheese has completely melted. Allow the pie to cool slightly before cutting.

Monday, July 11, 2011

Everyday Treasures


Snail Shell
I returned home from the beach Friday afternoon, but it wasn't until this morning that I returned to the rhythms of my home and daily pulls of my own ebb and flow.  Friday was a day of reconnecting with Alan and Butters and of sharing our stories of how our weeks had unfolded separately.  Saturday and Sunday were filled with cleaning, packing, repairing, donating, errand running, furniture moving, and lawn mowing all at a slow saunter due to the wet heat of a wring-your-clothes-out July weekend.  Today will be another hot one and tomorrow should be all the talk on the local news as it is scheduled to reach 99 hot and humid degrees.

This morning I awoke to sunshine and all the possibilities on the world ahead of me.  Butters ate while I made coffee and finished folding a load of laundry left over from last night.  We finally headed out the door and all Butters wanted to do was head straight down the driveway and out onto the street.  She stubbornly refused to step foot in our own yard and I gave her the benefit of the doubt that the heat was getting to her as well.  She sniffed her usual spots while I gazed up at the passing trees and down at the clover in each passing yard.  She stiffened her little body and quickened her pace as we approached the home on the left that has a large female dog that lives behind her invisible fence.  This dog will occasionally let us pass without incident but prefers to let us think she will give us pass only to rush up to the invisible fence line moments after we pass her driveway and come to a crashing halt with a deep loud bark.  I say "it's ok, and good girl" as much to Butters as to her and myself and off we go.  Today Illa, as her owners call her, was not out and about but Butters and I were both on alert until we passed her house.  We relaxed our pace, reached the end of the street and headed down the hill to inspect the open flat land in our neighborhood.  I looked at the growth of a shared garden area that two neighbors tend to and Butters sniffed all the smells of other dogs and animals that had passed before her.  As the heat was rising in time with Butters panting I cut our walk short and took her home. 

After putting Butters back in the house with water and a treat I headed out on a walk of my own.  As hot as it was I still wanted to stretch my legs some more and take a different walk through the neighborhood.  I was rewarded by an intricate snail shell that I saw in a culvert on the street.  I passed by it and caught a glimpse of the shell surrounded by what I thought were ants and then decided to pause and turn around for a second look.  Last night's rain must have washed pine needles and bark debris into a swirl around it and there was only an ant or two inspecting it.  The shell was empty and so I picked it up with a smile and heart beat of someone that just found treasure.  This simple shell along with the beauty of purple clover flowering, queen anne's lace bursting along the seems of the meadow and morning glories wrapping their way around hills and stalks reminded me that there is treasure all around me.  All I have to do is step outside my door and open my eyes to it.  The treasures of home may be more familiar and seasonal but they are none the less beautiful.

Sunday, July 3, 2011

She Whispers

collect sacred poetry
as it is revealed
in pools
of illuminated
familial fluid.

And then, unburdened
meet
the rhythmic lessons

      waves
               walk
  clearing     
           bursts
                          listen
                 glint
                          sway

Friday, July 1, 2011

In the Garden

Yesterday afternoon I was out back in the garden watering and pulling weeds and decided to go inside and grab the camera and capture the late afternoon sun shining on the plants.  My neighbor spied me through the trees taking pictures and got a good laugh at me.  I had no idea anyone was anywhere around but just laughed back with her.  I am sure I looked funny squatting in the grass snapping pictures of basil and tomatoes and such.  She gave me some beautiful flowers to plant and we traded jalepeno peppers from her garden and zuchini from my mother's garden. 

White Squash~just pretty yellow blooms so far.....looking forward to seeing the squash

Cucumber~I like this one because it looks like a watermelon

Dill Weed

 Miniature Tomatoes

Okra~first time I have grown this...

Heirloom Tomato blooms

Our little Postage Stamp of a Garden~flooded after my chat and trading with the neighbor

Dwarf Basil Plant

Green Tomato~I am babying this one as it is the only one we have so far

Bumble Bees enjoying the Bee Balm Flowers

Wishing everyone a happy and long weekend!

Wednesday, June 29, 2011

Miniature Tomatoes and Moving my Body

Fresh picked miniature tomatoes, hot from the sun and full of flavor
I am sitting at my desk eating a lunch of delicious raw vegetables and hummus (the miniature tomatoes from my garden taste like they came from Eden) and catching up on some internet browsing.

The recent internet browsings that resonate the most with me today:
 This week I am continuing the 30 Days of Something and find I am pushing myself a little more.  I am still trying to make up my mind about how I feel about this pushing though.  At the beginning of the month I was walking outdoors/indoors, practicing yoga or some type of intentional body movement for at least 20 minutes.  Since last week, I am working out for 10 minutes doing various upper body, lower body, core body, yoga moves or weight lifting and then walking and running 30 minutes. 

I am new to running and really to exercise in general.  I ran all over as a child as well as roamed the neighborhood on my bicycle, but my teenage years were tumultuous to say the least and also the time I started smoking.  I did not play sports in high school and am not generally competitive in that nature so even if circumstances were different I don't know that I would have gotten into sports at the time.  I can be competitive against myself, but it is just not something that generally feels good to me when others are involved.  Flash forward to my freshman year in college when a bunch of the girls on my hall talked me into signing up for intramural soccer.  The first person that I knocked down (by accident) caused me to completely stop and I gasped and helped her up as I apologized over and over again.

In college I also worked out quite a bit at the Nautilus (a local gym) for one year as we were able to sign up for a gym membership and use that as our PE credit.  I enjoyed that because I did compete against myself and it was also the strongest I have been, muscle wise. I took up yoga in my late twenties and followed that for almost 2 years but then got distracted planning a wedding and then my yoga teacher closed his practice and followed his dream on moving to Colorado.

I would like to think I will become stronger now then I have ever been, even stronger than my 20 something self and since starting the 30 Days of Something  I have noticed a few shifts:

  • I no longer want music or television or any sound on around me.  Previously I turned on music videos or watched the ticker at the bottom of the screen on CNN and got caught up with the news.  I used all of this activity so I would not become bored.  Now I just feel my body and listen to my breath.  
  • I am understanding more about pace.  Monday I felt like I should change my pattern from 30 minutes of walking/running to seeing how long I could sustain the running and asking myself what is hurting first, my legs or my lungs/heart.  
  • Now that I don't smoke I find that I can excercise longer and can actual build the intensity.
  • Distance is beginning to trump time.  Tuesday I decided to stop measuring the time I was walking/running and to start seeing how far I could walk/run.  I did just over 2 miles in 35 minutes yesterday and today which doesn't seem like much if you are a runner, but for me I see it as an accomplishment.
  • Today as I was running I found myself counting to twelve over and over and over again.  It was my way to push through on the run, a form of distractionto help go just a few seconds more before I had to reduce the intensity and return to walking. 

Overall I have a great sense of well being since beginning this challenge and think it must be all those happy endorphins that are being released.  Yeah to happy endorphins I say!!

So on the one hand I have a better sense of well being and know that I am gaining strength (my ultimate goal) and on the other hand I wonder if all of this is just mindless and wasteful.  I am literally running in a loop (on the treadmill) and counting to myself for 30+ minutes.  I guess eating is a different form of running in a loop as well though...you have to keep doing it over and over again to live, and breathing is the same, and really all of life we are running in some kind of "loop".  Maybe what is different is acknowledging it, seeing this pattern for what it is and realizing that even if I was outdoors hiking, if I did that everyday it too would become a loop.  Hmmm.... 

I really do love this 30 days of something challenge as I have now started working out everyday and I know it is possible to make it happen.  There are some other things I really want to make happen as well and the Universe has sent me so many prompts today to begin...to put one foot in front of the other and see where it takes me....to give answer to the questions that are holding me back in other areas of my life. 

Begin is such a green word for me.  I visualize it as a delicate shoot pushing through the earth...a vine reaching for the light... new life pulsating in rhythm to the sun.  I think I will begin by organizing my room and making way for new creations.

What are beginning this week?